


forever in my mind (only you)

by lavi0123



Series: lavi does maiko halloweek 2020 [5]
Category: Avatar: The Last Airbender
Genre: (platonic soulmates hinted at because they deserve it, F/M, Fall Maiko Week 2020, Mai (Avatar)-Centric, Soulmate AU, can you tell I love Mai, no beta we die like lu ten, the fleshed-out AU will feature them more prominently), will i ever stop writing fics like that? probably not!
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-02
Updated: 2020-11-02
Packaged: 2021-03-08 21:35:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,864
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27353584
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/lavi0123/pseuds/lavi0123
Summary: Love always came down to one thing: the soulmarks. Everyone was born with a few: some for family members, some for close friends, some for close lovers.Zuko and Mai didn’t care much for having their futures spelled out for them. They got enough of that from their parents, they didn’t need it from marks that meant nothing in the end.Or: Mai and Zuko have each other's soulmarks, but only Mai knows
Relationships: Azula & Mai (Avatar), Mai & Ty Lee (Avatar), Mai/Zuko (Avatar)
Series: lavi does maiko halloweek 2020 [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1990834
Comments: 8
Kudos: 63
Collections: Fall Maiko Week 2020





	forever in my mind (only you)

Love was a funny thing, in that it had multiple meanings and took various forms but always came down to one thing: the soulmarks.

There were stories of the old days, when all people had no soulmarks. Back when that was the norm, when love had to be sought out rather than known. It made most people laugh. Love was hard enough, why not make it easier with a guarantee of future relationship success

Some, however, did not laugh. They longed for the old days, albeit for different reasons.

Zuko and Mai, in particular, didn’t care much for having their futures spelled out for them. They got enough of that from their parents, they didn’t need it from marks that meant nothing in the end.

They both had a soulmark for Azula, Mai’s declaring them best friends and Zuko’s declaring them siblings. They’d liked them at first, admiring how pretty the blue dragon was, even comparing them with Azula, at the time a bright, smiling little girl. But as Azula grew, as her once-gentle features began to twist and sneer, as the flames in her hand grew bigger and brighter with each day, as they turned blue, Zuko and Mai winced more at her mark on them. They wished, yet again, for an end to this soulmark nonsense.

But, for this exact reason, they also hid a secret from each other.

* * *

“Mai!” The named girl looked up at Zuko, who was grinning as he twirled his swords. “Look what I can do!” Narrowing his eyes in concentration, he charged at the training dummy, then leapt up, did a flip, and landed cleanly on his feet on the other side, jabbing his sword into what Mai supposed was the dummy’s back. Zuko looked back at her with shining eyes. “See? Wasn’t that awesome?”

“So awesome,” she repeated with a small smirk. On her left wrist, a rainbow dragon ringed with silvery-bronze flashed with warmth.

* * *

“Try to knock the apple off the other person's head, like this.” Azula shoved out her index and middle finger, setting the apple aflame.

Mai gasped, looking up at the apple in worry. It was dangerously close to burning off her hair, and not only would that hurt, it would also mean punishment for her.

Zuko, for some reason, seemed to only have eyes for her, and he ran towards her with alarming speed, She tried to stop him with a cry of alarm, but he ignored it, pushing them both into the fountain.

“Ugh!” Mai scowled, cheeks flushing a deeper red. What a predicament to land herself in.

Azula laughed, sharing a grin with Ty Lee, and Mai scowled. “See, told you it would work!”

Zuko’s eyes had drifted to something below, and suddenly, his eyes widened. She followed his gaze, and when she saw where it had landed, her own eyes widened in turn, and she scrambled to stand, as did he. But he wasn’t quick enough–her eyes darted to his right wrist, where a black dragon curled contentedly. A black dragon...Mai knew that well, from Ty Lee’s excited squeals. It was her soulmark...and it was on Zuko, ringed with an aura of silver.

Her cheeks blazed again, and so did his, and he stomped away with enough speed to discourage her. Oh, what a fool she’d been, to keep this from him. Now, not only did he think she was only playing along for his amusement, but he also thought she was a giggling schoolgirl who only spent time with him because of her crush!

 _I really blew it_ , she thought sadly as Azula and Ty Lee continued to giggle as they swept her into another game of theirs. _I just hope he’ll speak to me again._

* * *

It was a couple of years later that they spoke again, when he was 13 and she was 12. He was sitting under a tree in the yard, looking oddly pensive, and she came to sit beside him. “Mind if I ask what’s up?”

He jumped. “Agni, Mai, you scared me.”

She smiled a little. “Nice to hear you talking to me again.”

“What do you–? Oh.” He looked down. “I guess we haven’t talked much in a couple of years, huh?”

“I guess not,” she agreed. “So? What’s up with you?”

He looked at her incredulously. “I’ve been avoiding you for two years, and the first thing you say after we see each other again is _what’s up with you_?”

“Oh, I’m sorry. Next time I’ll lead with a dismissal, would that be better?”

“N-no, I–!” Then he caught sight of the smirk on her face and relaxed. “You’re joking. Right. Of course.”

“At least your _avoidance_ of me hasn’t rendered you stupid,” she teased, and when his face began to cloud with guilt, she frowned. “Hey, none of that. I asked you a question, remember?”

“Right.” He smiled in apology at her (she really wished he would _stop doing that_ , the past was the past), then continued, “Um...there’s a war meeting going on, with my dad and a bunch of important generals.”

“I heard about that,” she recalled. “Azula mentioned it.”

“Yeah, I bet she’s there.”

“So what’s the problem?”

He wrung his hands, a nervous habit she recalled from a few years prior. “I want to go in myself, but...I wasn’t invited. I think I could convince Uncle to let me in, but...I’ve heard how those meetings tend to go. Do I really wanna sit in on that?”

“What have you heard?” She had some idea, of course, but she wanted to hear it in his own words, with his own thoughts attached.

“I’ve heard that the plans are barbaric,” he whispered, “that they sometimes propose unspeakable things. Things like _sacrifice_ and the _greater good_ , playing a game with people’s lives. I don’t know if I want to be part of that.”

She rested a hand on top of his, ignoring the pleasant hum as his soulmark brushed against his. “I know we haven’t spoken in some time, but...we’re friends. At least...I hope so. Whatever you want to do, I’ll be here for you. I hope you know that.”

He smiled at her. “Thank you, Mai. That...that actually helps.”

She smiled back. “I’m glad. So? What have you decided?”

“I’m gonna go. If I want to be the leader of this Nation...I can’t turn a blind eye to its dark underbelly. I have to face it head-on.”

She nodded. “Then do it. And I’ll be right here when you’re done.”

He hummed. “That’s good. There’s...actually something I’ve been meaning to talk to you about.”

“Oh?” She arched a brow. “What would that be?”

He shook his head with a sad smile. “The meeting’s about to start, and I want to catch Uncle before he goes in. Raincheck?”

“Sure,” she agreed. “Right after the meeting, we’ll meet here.”

“Sounds good.” He squeezed her left hand with his right, and her eyes widened fractionally. “See you later, Mai.” He was up and gone before she could even wish him luck.

* * *

She sat under that tree for hours. While she was there, at some point, it began to rain. It didn’t even start as drizzles–it just started pouring, as though the sky itself had been holding in so much emotion and had no patience to let it out gradually. The light dirt and grass around her turned to dark mud, and Mai wished she could care about the damage to her clothes.

She wasn’t a superstitious person, and she likely never would be, but from her experience, rain in the Fire Nation usually followed or preceded something bad. It was like some kind of narrative device brought to life. Mai wished she had some way of knowing how the meeting was going, or when it would finish. She was feeling ill at ease, and seeing Zuko would at least ease the knot in her stomach.

Azula found her early the next morning, startled at how muddy she was. “Your parents have been paying visits every hour. What have you been here all night for?”

“I...I was hoping to see Zuko,” Mai explained, clearing her throat and assembling her neutral expression. “Last I heard, he was going into a war meeting, and he said he’d meet me here afterwards.”

Realization dawned on Azula’s face, quickly followed by a smirk. “Ah, I see. The two lovebirds were going to have a rendezvous.”

Mai flushed. “We’re not–!”

“You should hear this from me, before anyone else tries to embarrass you with it or tease you for not knowing,” Azula continued. “Zuzu’s been banished.”

“He...what?”

“He spoke out of turn, and then when challenged to fight, he refused.” Azula scoffed. “Pretty pathetic, if you ask me.”

“I…” This didn’t make sense. _Why would he be so reckless? He knew what the meeting was gonna be like going into it, so why did he–?_

“Well,” Azula said with a sigh, “I can see you need time to process this. I’ll leave you be and make your excuses. You might want to wash up,” she added, “you smell as awful as you look.”

Azula’s words washed over her, but she didn’t properly register them, too focused on what she’d said about Zuko. Banished, banished, he was _banished_ , and all without saying goodbye.

At that moment, Mai’s soulmark on her left wrist flared with pain, and she gasped, keeling over as she rode out the wave until it abated. As it did, Mai remembered the last thing he’d done before the meeting, and she bit her lip to force back the tears in her eyes.

* * *

When next they saw each other, three years had passed. Zuko’s kindness had been replaced by a kind of foreign, sharp anger that she hated seeing in him. It reminded her of the war-hardened generals who proposed such plans as sacrifice, plans that Zuko had first mentioned three years ago as a reason for why he was nervous to go to the meeting.

Zuko had once said that he didn’t want to be part of that. Now, here he was, acting just like them. It felt poetic, in a cruel way, and maybe that was why she broke up with him.

“Your temper is out of control! You blow up over every little thing! You’re so impatient, and hotheaded, and _angry_!”

“Well, at least I feel _something_ ! You have no passion for anything, you’re just a big... _blah_!”

“It’s _over_ , Zuko. “We’re _done_.”

It felt final, in a way most things in her life were. It _should_ have been final. But Zuko always had a way of defying her expectations. For the first time in a long time, he trusted her (and Azula and Ty Lee) with his vulnerability. He explained his behavior, and his soulmark on Mai stung in tune with his distress.

“I'm confused. I'm not sure I know the difference between right and wrong anymore.”

It wasn’t really an apology. But it was enough for her, that he bared his heart to them, and she could tell from his expression and his soulmark that he meant every word. He’d always been more inclined to showhis remorse rather than _expressing_ it, and that was something Mai could get behind.

So of course she forgave him. Not only because of that, not only because of his soulmark, but also because of what she’d said all those years ago. They were friends, possibly even more than that, and she would always be there for him.

* * *

Things were nice, for a while. He told her he loved her, smiled at her with some hint of the way he used to, and seemed content to indulge her for a while.

They watched the sunset together, ate fruit tarts together, and overall had fun. It was tempered by Azula butting in at every chance she could, and Mai got the feeling that something else was going on that she wasn’t privy to, but wasn’t that all the more reason to have fun? Wasn’t that _more_ reason to let go of his worries, to do the opposite of what Azula wanted, to do what _he’d_ always wanted?

He had his father’s love. He was the Crown Prince again. He even had _her_.

So what was the problem?

 _It turns out_ , she realized later, holding his letter with shaking hands as tears fell from her eyes, _the problem was_ me _._

She should’ve known there was a reason he never brought up that old conversation from years ago.

* * *

But even with all that between them, even with her heart torn in two, even with the anger swelling in her that she had no qualms in expressing to him...she couldn’t hurt him. Nor could she let any harm come to him.

Seeing him with a bunch of prisoners, looking happier and more determined than he’d ever been, hurt deeply. But his soulmark was flashing urgently, like an alarm bell, and she knew that if she didn’t do something now, Azula would get him, or something else would happen, and he’d be trapped or hurt in a way that would haunt her with regret.

So Mai did what she always did when faced with a seemingly-impossible obstacle. She pulled out her shurikens and dropped into an attack stance.

“What are you doing?” The guards demanded.

“Saving the jerk who dumped me,” she replied with a smirk.

It was a quick fight, disappointingly so, but it accomplished its goal: Zuko and the others with him were able to get away.

Azula wasn’t happy, of course, but Mai had expected that. No princess in her right mind would take treason lying down, and Azula especially sought to nip disloyalty in the bud in her own way.

So naturally, when asked why she did it, Mai hit her where it hurt, just as Azula had always done to her. “I guess you don’t know people as well as you think you do. You miscalculated. I love Zuko more than I fear you.”

“No, _you_ miscalculated!” Azula screamed, and Mai hid a wince as her soulmark _burned_ with the princess’s rage. “You should’ve feared me _more_!” She dropped into an attack stance, and Mai reluctantly followed suit, trying to think of how she could escape as Azula gathered lightning between her–

Then who should come out of nowhere but Ty Lee, her soulmark on Mai pulsing as she quickly chi-blocked the princess and grabbed Mai’s hand with an urgent look in her eyes. “Let’s get out of here!”

They were too late. But Mai appreciated the effort. And as they were led away, all she could think about was Zuko, and how she hoped her efforts hadn’t been for nothing.

* * *

The next time she saw Zuko, his arm was bandaged, and he was struggling with his robe. As adorable as the sight was, Mai had a purpose in coming here, other than just seeing Zuko again, so she moved forward to help Zuko, explaining her release from prison casually.

“So, does that mean you’re not mad at me anymore?”

“Well...there’s still one thing,” she said. “A few years ago, you promised you’d discuss something with me, and we never really got to talk about it.”

His eyes widened. “Oh, Mai, I’m so sorry–”

“It’s okay. I think I know what you were going to tell me. Somehow...I think I’ve always known, ever since we first fell into that fountain.” She smiled a little and pulled up her left sleeve, showing the rainbow dragon ringed by bronze on her wrist.

His eyes widened, repeating the action for his right sleeve, showing a black dragon ringed by bronze on his wrist. “You knew that long and never said anything?”

“I didn’t want to assume. And you weren’t exactly willing to talk after you found out,” she reminded him pointedly, at which he blushed.

“Yeah...sorry about that. I wasn’t really sure how to feel about it then...but I swear, I figured it out by the time I was 13! That’s...that’s why I wanted to talk.” He smiled shyly at her. “I wanted to tell you not only that I had your mark...but that it was starting to turn bronze. I wanted to try being...more than friends.”

“And now that our marks are both fully bronze...how do you feel?” She asked softly.

“I think...if you’ll have me, _Lady Mai_ , I’d like to be your boyfriend.”

She smiled. “Of course, _Lord Zuko_. It would be my honor.”

He leaned down, and she leaned up, and their lips met in a kiss.

The war being over didn’t mean peace. It didn’t even mean that things were okay. There were reparations to make, rulers to negotiate with, and they had to figure out what to do with the colonies. But Zuko hadn’t even had his coronation yet, so for now, that could all wait.

Right now, Mai would be nowhere else but _there_ in that moment, with the person she trusted most in the world, and she couldn’t wait to see what their future had in store.

**Author's Note:**

> This is a bit of a tease for my Soulmate AU that I'm currently writing! Mai and Zuko won't be the focus of that one, but I wanted to get a feel for the worldbuilding (and get a sense of how people like it). So let me know what you think on that front!
> 
> And yes, I know it's very similar to another oneshot I wrote for this week, but...look, they're not the focus of my AU, really. Their relationship isn't much changed from canon, even with soulmarks. That might change, but that's how it is at the moment.
> 
> I just wanted to figure out how their relationship would work in the context of the AU (which will probably begin to be written/published in December? For Nano, I mostly wanna concentrate on an original fantasy piece I'm writing, so after Maiko Week, fanfic might be at a standstill for a while).
> 
> Other than that, though, I think that's about it! Two more of these are left, and those should be coming out today and tomorrow. Thanks for reading!


End file.
